Two days ago, Gaylon and I celebrated our 25 year wedding anniversary. I never really thought we’d make it this far. Not because I thought, going in, that we’d get a divorce, but because when I was nineteen years old, it was pretty much impossible for me to imagine myself 25 years older!
Now, I have to say that I think Gaylon has aged much better than I have. I think his silver-salted hair makes him look distinguished and sexy, in a roguish sort of way. Me, well, I don’t think I’ve aged quite as well! Let’s leave it at that. 😉
But I do have a couple of thoughts on love and marriage I’d like to share. I was convinced, after we’d only been married a few months that I’d made a terrible mistake. I was shocked to wake up and realize how completely different we were. We had taken advantage of pre-marital counseling (the Catholic Church requires it), we had dialogued thoroughly what should have been every possible angle, and yet, I felt like I’d been had. I remember sitting on the couch one afternoon and telling God there had to be some sort of mistake!
But I hung in there, and things got better. Sort of. We fought like crazy, off and on, for the first few years. In hindsight, I can say that was us refining one another. At the time, I would have told you (if I’d been honest) that I thought I was in hell.
But, slowly, over the years, the two of us grew together, and today I can honestly say we rarely fight. Now, we might bicker endlessly about the best route to take to a restaurant or movie theater, or whether 183 or Mopac will have more traffic, but really fight? No. There have been so many times when I really wanted to throw in the towel. There have been more times when I wanted to just kill him. And I have no doubt that he has felt the same things about me, many times over.
I would love to tell you all about how spiritual we are, and how you, too, can achieve 25 years of marriage, and give you advice from my ivory tower. But that would pretty much be crap, and I couldn’t live with myself if I posted something like that!
So how have we managed to stay married 25 years? God. I really believe that God has intervened and helped us when we surely would have self-destructed. I also can give credit to both of us being determined that divorce was not an option. And when divorce is not an option, you realize that you’re stuck with someone forever, so you find a way to make it work.
I am very thankful that I married a man who actually believes in me, loves me and supports me. I have been blessed far beyond what I deserve, and I’m honest enough to admit it. I am praying that we have another 25 years together, and if the last 25 are any indication, things are going to just get really, really good!